| so i never thought dating somone for so long would be thise hard. i mean its not hard for me like the guy and the guy like me back of cousrre thats actually the best part. to be with each other and enjoy one anothers company. but thats not whats been buging me and making this relation ship hard. its my mom. i always wonder why she makes it so much harder for m. why i cant go out by my self with him and so on. when i have responsiblities that i have to take care of. i know i have those responsibilities but man cant i get a beark. i under standa what my mom ses only sometimes. but i stil dont understand her meaning. when were we finish talking i stil lget the feeling that shes just jelouse or that she cant let go of the fact that im growing up. i mean comone im not growing up that fast.b ut theres a certain point im my life that have martured through the years. i knwo shes mym om and she has all right to stop me as long as im under her roof. but thats the thing if im still gonna be treated like a little kid i really dont want to stay here but i have no choice becuase im stupid i have to go to the community college across the street from ym house. and becuase of all the difficulty my family has with money and stuff its not the best way i can go. i just dont want my mom to feel like shes a nothing but shes just acting so stupid. for her to be jelouse is soo immature and for her to not tlak to me is so stupid to. i just dont know what to do or how to tlka to my mom without grounding me or nopt talking to me for a long time and im so sick of it. im really just fed up with it and i know if me and dennis do end up breaking up its most likely gonna be becuase of my mom. im most sure of it. its selfish of my mom to give me the responsebility of taking care of her own children and i do deserive to go out like a normal person.
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| well the day was good. didnt think about anything cept the night before and why my eyebrows were soo bushy. soo i got ready took ashowerin them oring and then nicole took me to go get my eyebrows done. it was fun. dennis was laughing at me coz i had curlers in my hair and i looked like a black women ready to go to the salon it was pretty embarasing. well after that took a nap got ready to go to dance practice and then got ready for the danece went to the dance and then dennis picked me up went to his house and then his family was there for him to show me off haha it was quite funny acctually. and then went to the dance even thought the music was lame and there wasnt alot of people it was still fun. my brother and sisters dates looked like thery were ahving a good time. it was cute. we dance lie stupid people doing thirller and crazy salsa coz now our school doesnt put freaky music on but its okay i wasnt so good on that kind of dancing anyways. then after went with my friends to the light house restaurant in downtown longbeach. itwas TIGHT!!! all in all the night was fun....thanks God for reminding me to put you first and always trust that youll help me in everything i need to do.
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i have a life and i had my senior year planed out and thanks everyone thats not going to happen
nice example you all are thanks for judging me i really apreciate it.
oo and thanks also for pulling me out of the ministry i love the most. my kids at childrens church are really going to be happy about that.
and as for everyone else at school. im sry i cant talk to you coz the only person i can talk to is God right now.
thank you pyros for having my back for really getting to know me. and u wonder why i dont socialize with you. coz all of you guys are just a whole bunch of drama queens. trying to look for the next thing to talk about. i just want u guys to know that it is my fault and im sorry for putting that post up. but to me i dont have to explain myself becasue i know that im not like that and im not going to go through it like before. i know not to have sex before marraige and i know whats wrong from right i know my morrals and im going to stick with it no matter what im still human soo i will make my mistakes but know that all of you guys are wrong to think anything like that of your own member. if you guys were soo concerned about me i would think you would talk to me aobut it first before it went through the whole church and leaving a sorry comment doesnt count. i know all of you are concerned but it doesnt seem like u guys are. thanks for thinkg of how it would make me look like or even my mom. thanks for making me look like a hor that has sex. i really apreciate it.
i dont want any sorrys from you or any pitty but just know you guys arent so perfect yourselves so quit putting people down and quit thinking your better than everyone coz your not and if anything your worse.
again im sorry for the cussing and im sory for what happened.
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| so today i went to a holloween party. it was tight! i wore a costume and i made it specially since were on a budget becuse of my debut. i kind wish i could have got a car but whatevers. i know mym oms doing alot for me and i really dont deserve it but yea. well anyways back to the party it was fun dances a lil ate a lil all the good stuff. everyone was dressed all out and it was soo tight there was this one mexica dude and i really thought he was real and that he just went into the party coz u know had one of those carts where they make the chicherones and the mexican corn. man i was soo bomb. i hung out with yasmani and stuff. haha hes my number 1 fan in water polo. said i was the shit, it was soo tight. i never really had a fan before. well yea. but everyone looked cute at the party coz they were alla dressed up i was in a little athena costume made out of a pillow case and some gold ribbons it lookeds oo cute. but yea. i miss dennis and i misss ate kitz..... sigh
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